Crash of the Titan

This morning I have been conducting some research pertaining to human interaction with computers and some of the overall ramifications of prolonged usage. In particular, I've discovered today a threshold exists wherein if a subject's hard drive becomes corrupted slowing the processes down to a crawl, the subject will begin to avoid entirely the computer in which it is housed. The subject in question is me. The hard drive in question is reluctantly assisting the subject in writing this blog after an excruciating ten minute delay to get an explorer window open. I've tried defragging, dumping data, deleting, and putting a diaper on it but my laptop just does not seem to be getting any better. It may be time to take old yeller out to the woodshed. I figured I would share this with you in case Mr. Steve mysteriously disappears in the coming days.

In the meantime enjoy this video as if it were the last (Again, with the effect driven over-dramatization. What is it with this guy?)

Where have you gone, Joe DiMaggio?

When I was but a boy, my mother would often get on my case about not leaving a note when I go off somewhere. Almost 30 years later it appears my manners have not much improved, but, at the very least, I will always report on where I've been after the fact.

Well, nothing much happened in the last week and a half...oh yeah, Amelia turned one on the last of March and we had a rocking party with a ducky cake, thirty of Amelia's best friends, and a video up-link from Tampa, Florida so that Amelia's Omi could be there too . Hmm..was there anything else? No, not really...well actually, there was also that trip to San Francisco where we met up with our cousins Igrid, Eric and their beautiful daughter Anya, played in a Pro/Am tournament at an incredible course designed by Greg Norman with the PGA Nationwide Tour's number three player on the money list , cruised around the Golden Gate bridge and Alcatraz, watched some sea lions barking at each other in disputes over prime real estate, stayed in a posh hotel owned by football legend John Madden, took a first class tour of the wine making operations and fermentation caves of Wente Vineyards, tasted each of the finest wines of said vineyard normally only available to their club members, watched some of the Wine Country Golf Classic Tournament from the Nationwide sky box, drove around aimlessly while attempting to find the intersection of Haight and Ashbury, hiked among the sequoias of Muir Woods (thanks, Liz!) and came face to face with a mountain lion who had made a cave of a giant hollow redwood next to the path, walked to the pacific ocean along the Tennessee Valley trail and saw a migrating whale swim by the cliff we were standing on, stayed our last night in San Francisco's first environmentally friendly hotel, and met up with a long time friend, Chris, who I hadn't seen in over ten years to catch up on old times. You know... just a typical week.

Yes, really. Nadine won a trip through her work, Nationwide, which made this trip possible. Basically we were treated like a king and queen for a week and got to revel in the fact that it was all free to us. Thank you, Nationwide. We are on our side...resting.

Zach and Amelia are so happy to see each other again after a whole week of being apart. I think both of them enjoy the company of tykes their own age. Amelia especially appreciates being the actor rather than the actee which never seems to be the case when big brother is around. Don't get me wrong, he is a very gentile and kind soul, but his energy level output competes with that of the sun.
Since Zach wasn't able to attend Amelia's b-day soirée as he was already off having a great time with his cousins, aunt, uncle, and grandmother, he is just now discovering the spoils of the festivities. One toy in particular he is especially fond of is a wooden toy alligator that wobbles when you pull its string. He appears to have some supernatural connection with the Gator as if it is somehow an oracle advising him of which University he has become destined to attend.

Go Gators.

Welcome back.

Spring break two thousand eight!!! Whoooo!

This week is spring break for the area schools, so I get to spend some quality time with Elijah. Forgive me if I can't get around to posting a whole lot this week, as I reckon I'll be pretty busy. Although it doesn't feel much like spring just yet, we are going to take a walk down to the park once nap time is over. Hats and gloves all around, of course.

Amelia has become quite the nurturer in the last couple of weeks and taken up studying the things I do in tending to Zach's needs. One of my more important functions, in Amelia's eyes, is wiping Zach's mouth when he spits up. To practice her care giving skills she dabs at Zach's face with a burp cloth a couple times every minute whether he needs it or not. Zach, being of a slightly more practical nature, feels this may be a bit excessive and has advised her on numerous occasions to conserve wiping for only those times in which it is necessary. She, of course, replies that it is no trouble at all and that she doesn't mind doing it. The force of motherhood is strong with this one.

Drive

As you can probably tell, I've been somewhat 7734 bent on getting Zachary's crawling gears switched from reverse to drive. In my experience, a baby's entire attitude changes and a great deal of confidence is gained once they can start seeing the direction they're moving. Zach appears ready for such a revelation. This morning I came up with the brilliant plan of setting up Zach on his fours with feet to the couch. "Surely if this gentleman Zach is to be so inclined to move any one direction, forward shall he be bound", I thought to myself...verbatim. Not two minutes later he began protesting loudly about how I was infringing on his rights as a baby and am vastly outnumbered according to his most recent census. There was no way to reason with him on the issue and it was all a little bit scary, so I moved him to back where he wanted to go.

You've won this round. Next time, Mr. Zachary. Next time.

Why Blog?

I spent the last eight years in a cubicle where to be sitting in front of a computer writing something is to be fulfilling ones destiny. Whether it be loss descriptions, underwriting guidelines, or insurance applications you aren't earning money unless your fingers are tapping. Now that I'm home all day, why should it be any different? Old habits die hard and kicking, so long as you keep reading, I'll keep writing.

One thing that was lost without any uncertainty in my metamorphosis from insurance mule to baby professional was my propensity for the daily facial depiliation. Being in direct genetic lineage of Barbarossa affords me in the span of a month whiskers thick enough to ward attacks from saber tooth tigers. Oh yes, Mr Steve's ancestors thrived in the ice age. My latest experiment was to see how long I could go without shaving at all. After holding out for more than a month and looking somewhere in between Jerry Garcia and Grizzly Adams this trend was brought to an abrupt end with but a mere question from my wife, "When are you going to shave that thing?"

Yesterday morning after the kids went down for nap, I got out the wool sheers and peeled away the layers of winter accumulation. When Zachary and Amelia awoke, both of them were simply stunned and confused about who it was exactly that has come to pick them up out of their sleeping quarters. Zach eventually warmed up to me but it appears that Amelia is still a little apprehensive and wants to make sure that I am not just some guy who does a really good impression of her dad but looks nothing like him.

Before:




After:

Amelia can now officially be considered one of the walking as it has become her choice mode of transportation. According to Elijah, she is now up to 33 consecutive steps and is able to traverse corners with minimal whiplash.
"Hi" continues to be her favorite word often repeating it twenty times to every new person, animal, and toy she comes in contact with.

Zachary is especially close to making some forward progress with his crawling. Just today, he realized that he is able to lunge forward from his hands to get closer to all the cool stuff in front of him. When I tuck his legs for him, his arms do move forward but he has yet to complete the crawling motion on his own. It seems as though he has the full concept and the strength but hasn't realized the full benefit to crawling forward instead of backward.

Didge

The didgeridoo of Australia is arguably the oldest known musical instrument. The strongest evidence of this theory is based on its naturally occurring formation caused by termites eating the fleshy centers of the outback's plentiful eucalypti. When the termites have finished feasting they leave large hollow tubes waiting to be harvested by Australia's Aboriginal people. The tube is then cut at both ends forming one of the most ominous sounding wind instruments of the music world. It is believed by some to have spiritual meditative qualities, others assert the didge can heal certain ailments, while still others hold the opinion that it is a most entertaining way for babies named Zach and Amelia to spend the morning.